What it all comes to

So here we are at the beginning of our last week of travel ...

I've been trying to put together what we've seen and experienced and understand why this time was so important for me; I did so much to take it and it seemed like a matter of life and death, as if I needed this trip in order to breath again, to feel alive.

A year ago 6 months around the world, seemed like an impossible achievement, like something that needed to be left to the 'people with guts'.
I had pictured this sabbatical from Lara as a dream to clear my head and figure out in which direction I wanted to go ... It had to be a time to learn, a time that had to TEACH ME.

Did it teach me? Did I actually figure something out?
Yes in some way I did.

First of all I understood that my expectations are really high and that when you fantasize something is never as it actually is.

Also by the time you manage to move away from your work schedule, your work worries and the daily things that we are accustomed to, you realize how in the big picture it's all crap. Obviously this does not apply to everyone. ... but is managing someone else's money (in a  company that in the end only rewards you so you'll be more motivated to continue) and that does not actually improve anything in the world something that makes ME passionate?

In order to succeed in something you have to be committed to it, you need to be passionate about it, so the point is figuring out what it is that makes you passionate?
I envy people that know what they want, when you are sure about what you want everything is easier and on the practical side, it's cheaper too.

In the article below it is mentioned that travel opens your eyes on what you do not really know, for me it has opened my eyes on what makes my heart shake and how often you are powerless among what you see.

http://www.southeastasiabackpacker.com/notes-from-the-editor-what-does-travel-teach-us

As mentioned in the article I too, got a PADI (advanced actually), learned to sleep with cockroaches, eat in places where the walls are so black you thought you would for sure get sick from just sitting on the chair, be patient when everybody rolls over you to get on the bus and nobody respects the line.
But what it really taught me are those important things that move my heart and make me passionate.

Our were not 40 days but 150 days dream ....